Catch Up

I'm sorry. I know that you wake up every morning, jumped out of bed, race to the computer and check the Kitchen sink and More and, for the pass few days, there has been no payoff. No new posts. The rest of your day is gray, you check back a few times, but no-I have forsaken you.

Ya, sorry about ruining your life. This week is nuts - beyond nuts! I'm forcing myself to be a people person for the sake of my Pure Romance business, which involves a lot of smiling and general cheerfulness. That is draining!

When I finally get home from all my sunshine and rainbows spreading, I just don't have anything witty to say!

I spy with my little eye...

From my spot on the couch, I can glance around the room and find five vignettes that make me want to inflict harm on the man that I live with. I love him, so not anything that would leave a mark-just a swift kick to the shin or a nipple twister would suffice.

Exhibit A - Those are socks. On the coffee table. The man won't put his book on the top of the toilet tank because he is afraid of poo germs, but it's okay to put your SOCKS on the coffee table.
Exhibit B: Count 'em. One, two, three pairs of shoes under the coffee table. When I try to put them away he tells me he needs to wear them tomorrow. Really? Three pairs?


Exhibit C - Unworn Adidas sandals. Why is that an irritant, one asks. Well, that's the third pair I've bought. The third pair that aren't right. The nubbies on the inner soles pinch his feet. Three pairs, three styles of nubbies, three failures.


Exhibit D - That's a strange place for a hat rack. That's because it's not a hat rack. It's a sconce light. Just since we've been chatting a third one has made it's way to the pile.

Exhibit E(final exhibit)- Well, that's just a harmless guitar. He doesn't play guitar. He bought strings for his new musical instrument and set it in the corner. That was six days ago. I have no idea where it came from.


Oh Al, I love you.

WTF Wednesday - No, Seriously WTF?

Oh, She's Gonna Looove This!

A pictorial tribute in honor of my sissy's birthday.

You've been my sister
for many years,
We've laughed together
And shed some tears.
We've had harsh words,
And pulled some hair
But against the world
We are a terrific pair.
Our times together are very few,
I just want to say I LOVE YOU!

Bitch Test

On occasion, my family, co-workers and friends will inform me that something I have said or done is not polite, overly sarcastic, snarky or "bitchy".

Most of the time, I don't believe them. For example, my sister and I were at a garage sale and the home owner asked if I needed any "Brand New Size B Bras." I responded " No, we are a large breasted family."

I thought this was hilarious, my sister says it was bitchy - that I was implying that home owner has small boobs. Not true, I was simply informing her that those "Brand New Size B Bras" wouldn't work on my frame.

So, today I have a bitch test for you and I would appreciate your honest opinion.

Picture this - I arrive at the car wash at 5:20.

Me: Hello, I would like a full service wash with an interior detail.
Car Wash Gentleman: I don't have time for that.
Me: Why not?
Car Wash Gentleman: We close at 5:30
Me: Well, how long does it take?
Car Wash Gentleman: About 15 minutes
Me: You are unwilling to stay 5 minutes late for a paying customer?
Car Wash Gentleman: We close at 5:30
Me: Fine, do what you can I guess

Al Borlan (aka: my live in lova) says I'm an asshole. That in no way should I expect him to stay 5 minutes late and I am inconsiderate for asking. Don't I know that you can't show up somewhere 10 minutes before they close.....and so on.

Here's my case:
1. I didn't show up at 5:29, I came at 5:20 - a full 10 minutes before they close.
2. If you close at 5:30, you don't turn away a customer at 5:20!
3. I wasn't asking for an hour long massage - I merely wanted a 15 minute interior detail.
4. If my boss approaches me at 4:50 for assitance, I don't tell him "Sorry-I'm off in 10 minutes"

What do think about the Car Wash Case?

Photo Friday (early Saturday) "We're All Gonna Die"

This is awesome, I've been studying it for an hour. Fellow people watchers, you'll love it. I've started to create stories for each person.

Ya, that's what I do on Friday nights. Create fictional lives for complete strangers.

We're All Gonna Die - 100 Meters of Existence

Dear Lost Follower

Why have you forsaken me?

I only had 8 followers. That's not very many. Now I have 7, which is even less than 8. **Sigh** I ask not for sympathy or pity, I only seek answers from you - lost follower . Where did you go? I feel like we were really beginning to connect, to share intimate experiences over the blogoshpere.

Did I not comment your blog enough? Come back to me, I will LOL your every post.

Did I offend you? I will never post photos of weenie babies or make fun of children again.

Oh, lost follower, how will I find the will to write without your avatar smiling coyly from my sidebar?

I miss you.