The Kitchen Sink and More

Catch Up

2009-05-20T18:22:00.000-07:00

I'm sorry. I know that you wake up every morning, jumped out of bed, race to the computer and check the Kitchen sink and More and, for the pass few days, there has been no payoff. No new posts. The rest of your day is gray, you check back a few times, but no-I have forsaken you.

Ya, sorry about ruining your life. This week is nuts - beyond nuts! I'm forcing myself to be a people person for the sake of my Pure Romance business, which involves a lot of smiling and general cheerfulness. That is draining!

When I finally get home from all my sunshine and rainbows spreading, I just don't have anything witty to say!

I spy with my little eye...

2009-05-16T18:23:00.000-07:00

From my spot on the couch, I can glance around the room and find five vignettes that make me want to inflict harm on the man that I live with. I love him, so not anything that would leave a mark-just a swift kick to the shin or a nipple twister would suffice.

Exhibit A - Those are socks. On the coffee table. The man won't put his book on the top of the toilet tank because he is afraid of poo germs, but it's okay to put your SOCKS on the coffee table.
Exhibit B: Count 'em. One, two, three pairs of shoes under the coffee table. When I try to put them away he tells me he needs to wear them tomorrow. Really? Three pairs?

Exhibit C - Unworn Adidas sandals. Why is that an irritant, one asks. Well, that's the third pair I've bought. The third pair that aren't right. The nubbies on the inner soles pinch his feet. Three pairs, three styles of nubbies, three failures.

Exhibit D - That's a strange place for a hat rack. That's because it's not a hat rack. It's a sconce light. Just since we've been chatting a third one has made it's way to the pile.

Exhibit E(final exhibit)- Well, that's just a harmless guitar. He doesn't play guitar. He bought strings for his new musical instrument and set it in the corner. That was six days ago. I have no idea where it came from.

Oh Al, I love you.

WTF Wednesday - No, Seriously WTF?

2009-05-13T17:59:00.000-07:00

Oh, She's Gonna Looove This!

2009-05-12T17:17:00.000-07:00

A pictorial tribute in honor of my sissy's birthday.

You've been my sister
for many years,
We've laughed together
And shed some tears.
We've had harsh words,
And pulled some hair
But against the world
We are a terrific pair.
Our times together are very few,
I just want to say I LOVE YOU!

Bitch Test

2009-05-11T19:24:00.000-07:00

On occasion, my family, co-workers and friends will inform me that something I have said or done is not polite, overly sarcastic, snarky or "bitchy".

Most of the time, I don't believe them. For example, my sister and I were at a garage sale and the home owner asked if I needed any "Brand New Size B Bras." I responded " No, we are a large breasted family."

I thought this was hilarious, my sister says it was bitchy - that I was implying that home owner has small boobs. Not true, I was simply informing her that those "Brand New Size B Bras" wouldn't work on my frame.

So, today I have a bitch test for you and I would appreciate your honest opinion.

Picture this - I arrive at the car wash at 5:20.

Me: Hello, I would like a full service wash with an interior detail.
Car Wash Gentleman: I don't have time for that.
Me: Why not?
Car Wash Gentleman: We close at 5:30
Me: Well, how long does it take?
Car Wash Gentleman: About 15 minutes
Me: You are unwilling to stay 5 minutes late for a paying customer?
Car Wash Gentleman: We close at 5:30
Me: Fine, do what you can I guess

Al Borlan (aka: my live in lova) says I'm an asshole. That in no way should I expect him to stay 5 minutes late and I am inconsiderate for asking. Don't I know that you can't show up somewhere 10 minutes before they close.....and so on.

Here's my case:
1. I didn't show up at 5:29, I came at 5:20 - a full 10 minutes before they close.
2. If you close at 5:30, you don't turn away a customer at 5:20!
3. I wasn't asking for an hour long massage - I merely wanted a 15 minute interior detail.
4. If my boss approaches me at 4:50 for assitance, I don't tell him "Sorry-I'm off in 10 minutes"

What do think about the Car Wash Case?

Photo Friday (early Saturday) "We're All Gonna Die"

2009-05-08T22:18:00.000-07:00

This is awesome, I've been studying it for an hour. Fellow people watchers, you'll love it. I've started to create stories for each person.

Ya, that's what I do on Friday nights. Create fictional lives for complete strangers.

We're All Gonna Die - 100 Meters of Existence

Dear Lost Follower

2009-05-07T19:59:00.000-07:00

Why have you forsaken me?

I only had 8 followers. That's not very many. Now I have 7, which is even less than 8. **Sigh** I ask not for sympathy or pity, I only seek answers from you - lost follower . Where did you go? I feel like we were really beginning to connect, to share intimate experiences over the blogoshpere.

Did I not comment your blog enough? Come back to me, I will LOL your every post.

Did I offend you? I will never post photos of weenie babies or make fun of children again.

Oh, lost follower, how will I find the will to write without your avatar smiling coyly from my sidebar?

I miss you.

WTF Wednesday - Caption Me!

2009-05-06T18:32:00.000-07:00

Happy hump day! I'm starting a new weekly tradition called WTF Wednesday! Captions are welcome and rewarded. With what, you ask-love...

Installment #1 -

Your Mom

2009-05-05T12:27:00.000-07:00

These are gifts your mom will love. No, I need you to trust me on this one. You will win back the love that she lost when your life turned out to be not what she imagined for you.

He meows when you stick the pencil in.Joint shaped Birthday candles - Don't forget to tell mom you can't really smoke it-it's wax, and wax doesn't get you high.

There is a bladder in there to hold your alcohol. Worn under your shirt, you can BYOB to ball games, parks, work functions, Costco and church.
Weenie babies-why? because moms love weenies.

When she cries and tells that she loves you and that you may, in fact, amount to something - you are allowed to call me and thank me. Then put your mom on the phone so I can take all the credit.

Help! I'm Stuck to the Kitchen Floor!

2009-05-04T18:55:00.000-07:00

So I saw this at Walgreens :

And I thought - "oh cool, this will work perfect for my Pure Romance cue cards - I can look like a super cool artist rather than a Kindergartener with a glue stick"

I may have looked like a really cool graphic artist while spraying away and jamming out to the ipod, but I felt like a housewife when I was scrubbing my kitchen floors.

Ya, don't use this unless you have a studio, a garage or a tarp. I just spent over an hour drunkenly (did I mention the three glasses of wine associated with spray gluing and rocking out?) scrubbing the glue particles off the kitchen floor, the kitchen table, my ipod and the cat's paws. I could hear his sticky footsteps from the other room. Actually the clumpy tar and feather style cat hair clumps made cleaning up my mess that much more fun.

Moral of story: don't use spray glue unless you are qualified
Other moral of story: if your gonna be an unqualified spray gluer-don't drink and spray

Cut the Cord

2009-05-02T19:44:00.000-07:00

Saw this gem on the Today show yesterday. "Tummy Tubs"- put your kid in this bucket to wash it. Why? Because it reminds them of the womb. They feel safe and secure.

I don't have any kids, but it seems to me that these babies need to wake up to the real world. Guess what baby, your not in the womb anymore. Ya, life sucks -welcome. The earlier the little suckers learn that the better they will adapt. That one in the middle looks like it is about 2 years old. Shouldn't it have a job or something instead of hanging out in womby tub?

Next we'll we be sending kids to school in fluid filled womb suits and bubble wrap loafers.

Cellulite and Crab Rangoon

2009-04-30T17:31:00.000-07:00

I need to lose 15 lbs, like yesterday. A couple of years ago I lost 30lbs and have since gained 15 back. It's only a matter of time before the rest of those MF-ers come creeping back onto my ass.

I lost the weight before by, basically, depriving myself and it sucked. I thought that allowing junk food back in on the weekends wouldn't be that big of a deal if I stuck to an 1100 calorie day Mon. thru Fri.

*SIGH* I was wrong. I think I found a new stretch mark yesterday.

No worries, weight loss isn't going to become the main focus of this blog. But I will let you know of any monumental achievements.

Another thing I should mention is that I'm not off to a great start. I had crab rangoon for dinner. oops. try again tomorrow. Although, tomorrow is Friday and I really like Dr. Pepper on Fridays...

to be continued.

You Are Going to Have to Secede From the St. Louis MSA

2009-04-29T16:36:00.000-07:00

I love watching shows about drugs - something about people's lives falling apart scratches an itch for me. Just so you don't think I'm totally sadistic, I also like it when they get sober- ok, so there.

Naturally, I TiVo -ed the Discovery Channel's 3 part series "Meth Nation" "Heroin Nation" and "Cocaine Nation" because there are sure to be some good drug addicts in that mix.

Here I sit, watching a dramatization of a paranoia induced hallucination, when what do I see on the back of the Sherrif's jacket: Jefferson, County Missouri.

Damn it! The rest of the show is focused on "the meth capital of the world"and what the police in Jefferson County, MO are up against. Arrests are made, labs are busted and many toothless men in Nascar T-shirts are shown in Jefferson County, MO.

Listen lovely neighbor to the south, you have got to get your act together.

Hear me out, I love going to the river, I love shopping at the Bluffs and my own blood sister and mother live within your borders, but this is embarassing! It is as if our dirty underwear have been featured on National television.

The population north of 55 and 270 need you to shape up or ship out. St. Louis and Kansas City are the only two things holding this lame state together-can you start pulling your own weight, please!?

In Honor of Pig Disease....

2009-04-28T17:06:00.000-07:00

Really Effing Ugly Pigs! Enjoy!

Thank You for Being A Friend

2009-04-27T16:58:00.000-07:00

As a child, I was left alone a lot. More than the average child and far younger than the average child. But that's another post, another time.

I'm telling you this for a reason. When I was little, and alone, I turned to The Golden Girls for comfort. Yes, it's true Bea and the bunch got me through many a boogeyman filled night. If I was scared, I used the maternal foursome as a crutch. Just focus on the show and all the spooky nighttime sounds faded away. Lucky for me, there were a lot of Golden Girl marathons on Lifetime in those days.

Thus, upon hearing of Bea Arthur's death I was probably more affected than your average twenty something. In honor of my friend Bea, here are some of my favorite quotes from those marathon nights.

Dorothy: You'll have to excuse my mother. She suffered a slight stroke a few years ago which rendered her totally annoying.

Rose: Well, I'm here if you want to pick my brain.
Dorothy: Rose, honey. Maybe we should leave it alone and let it heal.

Dorothy: [to Sophia] You're a furry little gnome and we feed you too much.

Dorothy: It's wonderful dating in Miami. Every single man under eighty sells cocaine.

Rose: I don't think lying is really a good idea. I once cut school and that proved very bad.
Dorothy: Oh, Rose. We've all cut school. It couldn't have been that bad.
Rose: Oh, yes it was. That was the day they taught EVERYTHING.
Dorothy: The final piece of the puzzle.

Blanche: I've been rejected once.
Dorothy: From who?
Blanche: Weight Watchers... for being too thin.

Weekend Find: My Stickies

2009-04-26T19:09:00.000-07:00

Juiced Up Bookmarks for Really Cool People...Like Me. Check it Out

If you are planning to have a garage sale, please follow these 10 simple rules

2009-04-25T16:55:00.000-07:00

1. You must advertise with more than one sign. After the first turn, I still need to know where to go. The Gods of broken vacuum cleaners and baby clothes will not magically bring me to your door.
2. If you pack up early, you must take your signs down. Otherwise, I will knock on your door and ask to buy things inside your house.
3. If your ad says you open at 8:00 am, you must have all of your things out and priced at 8:00 am. If you are still bringing things out when I pull up I will take all your signs down because, clearly, you are not organized enough to have a garage sale.
4. If you have only junk, please call Goodwill. No one wants to buy mismatched shoes, skanky stuffed animals or Christmas decorations from 1973.
5. If you believe your things are priceless, do not have a garage sale. No one will pay $10 for a sconce I can purchase at T.J. Max for $12. For $2 more, I'll buy it new, thanks. You will be dragging all of your priceless treasures back inside the house at the end of the day.
6. If you don't put a price tag on something, very few people will ask you the cost because it's a garage sale, not an auction. If you can't decide on a price, take it back inside. If, for some reason, I do ask the cost, do not respond with "What's it worth to you?" because I will tell you 5 cents.
7. You must have a FULL garage or yard worth of items. If you do not have at least this much, put it in the basement and add to the pile until you have enough for a decent showing. If you have less than this and decide to have a sale anyway. I will stand at the bottom of your driveway and direct traffic away from your house.
8. Do not stare at your customers, no one is going to steal your collection of coffee mugs.
9. Do not harass your customers. We can decide on our own what is "a must have" or "a great deal." If you talk to me about an item I am looking at, I will promptly put it down and leave your garage.
10. If your garage smells like cat pee, mold, poop or old people, do not have a sale.

Photo Friday-Brent Stirton, Breathtaking Photojournalism

2009-04-24T09:26:00.000-07:00

I can't take a photo worth a darn, but I love photography. Brent Stirton is a moving Photojournalist and I would follow him around with lens cleaner to be a part of what he does.

See more of his work.

The Weedy Line Up

2009-04-22T18:01:00.000-07:00

A little help?

I'm not very good at things that us lady folk are supposed to be good at. Cooking, sewing, cleaning...things of this nature. Gardening also falls into this hellish, domestic mash up as well. Alas, I own a home so I figure I should plant some shit out front. It's a beautiful day in the Lou so I got down in the itchy grass to weed the flower beds. Problem is - I don't know what the eff is a weed and what's a thing I'm supposed to keep.

I was hoping (bats eyelashes) that you could help me identify these weedy suspects. Keep or pull?

Here We Go Around In Circles

2009-04-21T19:42:00.000-07:00

I got lost in Forest Park tonight. Yes, I grew up in St. Louis and I've lived here all my life but if you know me then you know I get lost in my driveway.

Driving home from the Galleria, I thought I was keen enough to "cut through" Forest Park. It didn't work and I ended up turning a 20 minute drive home into an hour.

The reason I am telling you this is that as I was passing the Art Museum for the 5th time I had to laugh at the obvious metaphor.

My life is lost in Forest Park. I am running in circles. I can't sleep. I need to get to the gym but I don't want to wake up early because it took so long to go to sleep. At work I can't concentrate because I'm worried that I won't have a job next week. That it doesn't matter if I post a blog on our website because we may not be here in May.

I'm running a 100 mph to get Pure Romance off the ground and am not getting traction.

I get home from work and my laptop doesn't leave my lap. Networking, searching, trying.

Then it's bed time and I've barely spoken two words to Patrick, the cats are pissed and I can't sleep. Thank Jebus I don't have kids. Of course, I guess I could drop them off at the Zoo on my way past.

Keeping Up With The Big, Dumb Liars!

2009-04-20T19:36:00.000-07:00

This is not what I was planning on posting today, but I am pretty fired up.

Forever 21 is proud to announce their new, plus size line and mentions Kim Kardashian as an example of a fuller figured person who can now shop at Forever 21. Ok, great. Because it used to be that only teeny little bitty tweens and asian ladies could shop there.

Kim K. gets pissed and fires back that she is not plus sized, she is a size 2.

Really?! A size 2? Biatch, please.

Listen, I don't think that you are plus size. I mean, you've got a lot going on in the rear, but the rest of you seems very average sized. However, if you are a size 2 then by God so am I. That makes Beyonce a zero and Kelly Clarkson a 4. Sounds good to me!

Come on! Everyone knows your fibbing and there is just no reason for it. No one is mad about you being an 8, it's cool-own it. You're gorgeous, let's get real.

Jennifer Love Hewitt did it a few years ago too after those photos of her looking like a normal lady in a swimsuit surfaced. Stop It!

Craigslist Humor

2009-04-19T17:23:00.000-07:00

Sometimes I browse Craiglist when I am feeling blue. It cheers me up. That and "Rock of Love" - those bitches can raise anybody's self-esteem. This ad is double cool because it's funny and it involves cats.

Ferocious Attack Kitten

Date: 2008-06-02, 7:10PM CDT

Ferocious attack kitten is available for adoption to any home willing to accept him.

This destructive kitty has been trained as a proud warrior and will fiercely defend your house, even against you. Well-trained since 10-weeks of age to attack anything in his presence, he will protect your family from evil things, including the following:

* insects

* other trained attack kittens

* babies

* toilet paper

* anything under a blanket

* unwanted house guests
* paper bags

* floor rugs

* Chuck Norris

* Feet.

Great with children (assuming you don’t like the children). Probably best used for professional catfighting. He is housebroken, but only because he wants to be. This attack cat has trained himself to seek out his food anywhere you hide it and rip the bag open to feed himself, great for those who travel extensively. Also trained to drink water out of toilet bowls and dishwater from items in the sink. Knows how to open some doors. He will find you wherever you hide.

Neutered (trust me, you wont want to him to procreate). Has not been declawed, but you'll figure that out really fast.

Understands and responds to a variety of vulgar and profane verbal commands. Has a very soft and furry belly, like a teddy bear - however he will bite your face if you try to touch it.

Willing to accept trades. Potential adopters must have experience with trained attack-kittens... please be prepared to show scars.

For the love of God, someone please take this thing out of my house.

An Open Letter to The Learning Channel

2009-04-18T15:11:00.000-07:00

Dear TLC Executives,

I am writing to remind you of the meaning for your station acronym. TLC=The Learning Channel.

Every Saturday, I browse through your listings for the week because I used to enjoy your programs and I still hold a glimmer of hope that I will find something worth Tivo-ing. Alas, every week it's the same lineup.

John and Kate Plus Eight
John and Kate Plus Eight
John and Kate Plus Eight
Say Yes to the Dress
Say Yes to the Dress
John and Kate Plus Eight
Bringing Home Baby
Bringing Home Baby
Baby Story
John and Katie Plus Eight
Say Yes to the Dress
Bringing Home Baby

I don't care about Jon, Kate or their eight children. I don't find women searching for a wedding dress the least bit interesting and I have no interest in babies or their trips home.

If you are experiencing success with this mind-numbing schedule of mama's, their babies, and their minivans, then, by all means, do what makes you money. Don't worry about be, I've got Nat Geo.

But please, for the sake of humanity and all things intelligent, change your name to "TSMC" - The Soccer Mom Channel.

Your Former Viewer
Katherine Proctor

Photo Friday - 1,000 Bricks 90 Cents

2009-04-17T13:51:00.000-07:00

Children at a brick factory in Fatullah

Photo Courtesy of Zoriah

Greg Rutter's 99 Things You Should Have Already Experienced On The Internet Unless You're a Loser or Old or Something

2009-04-16T17:57:00.001-07:00

couresty of http://youshouldhaveseenthis.com/

01) Grape Stomp
02) Charlie Bit Me
03) Chocolate Rain
04) Dancing Baby
05) Post Secret
06) Charlie The Unicorn
07) Mentos and Diet Coke
08) Numa Numa
09) Peanut Butter Jelly Time
10) George Lucas In Love
11) You're The Man Now Dog
12) Yatta
13) Star Wars Kid
14) Bubb Rubb
15) The Flying Spaghetti Monster
16) Dramatic Chipmunk
17) Homestar Runner
18) GI Joe Pork Chop Sandwiches
19) Fail Blog
20) Skateboarding Dog
21) All Your Base Are Belong To Us
22) Winnebago Man
23) We Like The Moon
24) I Can Has Cheezburger
25) Barney Vs. Tupac
26) Shining
27) Cute Overload
28) Rick Roll
29) Lazy Sunday
30) David After The Dentist
31) Powerthirst
32) Christian The Lion
33) Bert and Ernie Rap
34) Lady Punch
35) Leprechaun in Alabama
36) Where The Hell Is Matt
37) Boom Goes The Dynamite
38) Breakdancing Baby
39) Drunk Jeff Goldblum
40) Scarlet Takes A Tumble
41) Sepultura - Refuse resist (cover) By Gauchos
42) Gay Mount Everest
43) Afro Ninja
44) Cop Shoots Himself In Leg In Classroom
45) Tron Guy
46) "Leave Britney Alone"
47) Laughing Baby
48) I'm the Juggernaut Bitch
49) The Chairperson Falls
50) Take On Me The Literal Version
51) Bill O'Reilly Flips Out
52) Don't Tase Me Bro
53) The Landlord
54) Breakdancing Baby Kick
55) The Pet Penguin
56) Ms. South Carolina Answers A Question
57) I'm F*#king Matt Damon
58) Will It Blend
59) Spaghetti Cat
60) Tom Cruise Kills Oprah
61) Little Superstar
62) Chad Vader
63) Pretty Much Everywhere It's Going To Be Hot
64) I Like Turtles
65) Who Needs A Movie
66) Jake E. Lee Shreds
67) Hawaii Chair
68) Aussie Party
69) Hitler Plans Burning Man
70) Flirting with Magic
71) Look At The Horse
72) Asian Backstreet Boys
73) Leroy Jenkins
74) Pinky The Cat
75) Monkey Sniffs Finger
76) Sneezing Panda
77) Prison Inmates remake "Thriller"
78) Techno Viking
79) Ask A Ninja
80) Best Man Trips and Ruins Wedding
81) Best Wedding Toast Ever (Amy's Song)
82) Kitten Surprise (how to break up a cat fight)
83) Katana Sword Infomercial Goes Wrong
84) Matrix Ping Pong
85) La Pequeña Prohibida
86) Angry German Kid (translated)
87) Evolution of Dance
88) Ok Go – "Here It Goes Again"
89) Battle at Kruger (lions vs. buffalos vs. crocodiles)
90) Daft Hands
91) Human Beatbox
92) Most T-Shirts Worn At Once
93) Zero G Dog
94) Cuppy Cakes Song
95) George Washington
96) Scary Maze Prank
97) Gay Referee
98) Tranquilized Bear Hits Trampoline
99) Reporter Gets A Fly In The Mouth

Stop Me If You've Heard This One

2009-04-15T19:57:00.000-07:00

Or don't and just watch it again because it makes life happier.

Everyone has seen it by now but I just want to be a part of its redistribution. Why? Because it makes me feel good things are possible, that I can move mountains, that "oooohhhh chiiild things are gonna get easier..." Ok I'm stopping! Just watch it again. YouTube won't let me embed it so watch the video here.

What is it about this lady that makes me feel so empowered?

Legal, Free Listens?

2009-04-14T17:40:00.000-07:00

Are you a believer in internet radio? I am a halfway fan. Sites like Pandora and are great if you are in the mood to explore and have time to stop what you are doing and skip through the occasional horrendous melody. Even then, you don't get to play exactly what you want to hear. You put in your favorites and wish for the best, right? Then, of course, there is iTunes, which lets you listen to your perfect playlist - for a price. If I had saved all the money I've spent on iTunes I might not be eating so many Totino's Party Pizzas.

Enter "Just Hear It"- Still in beta form, Just Hear It was created by two USC students. The site allows users to search for songs, listen to full tracks and create multiple playlists. Genius, no? The perfect combination of free music and user controlled experience.

"Members" (by invite only for now) can create a media library and listen to it from anywhere. Sign up via email address to get updates and learn when the site is fully up and running. You might even get picked to be a super secret beta member.

According to the creators, Just Hear It is legal because "it pays for licenses from all major performing rights organizations which then pay the publishers and writers in proportion to the number of plays they get."

What do you think? A perfect combo or too utopian to be true? Check it out here.

There are Aliens Among Us

2009-04-13T16:40:00.001-07:00

Ok. I can't be alone here. These people are NOT normal. I know, I know no one is "normal", but this is way beyond your average wack-a-doo. There's something going on here.

Listen, I'm just going to throw my theory out there and see if I can get any support. The Duggars are aliens. They have been sent here to destroy us and are building an army to take over.

Visit msnbc.com for Breaking News, World News, and News about the Economy

Evidence:
1 Those kids don't make a damn peep and there are 18 of them. Aliens in training.
2 No one talks with that much enthusiasm and glee all the time. Programmable human suits.
3 They have 18 children and no debt. Outer space U.S monetary creation station.
4 The husbands name is Jim Bob. Alien humor.
5 No human can procreate that fast. Shortened alien gestation period.

Think it over. I'm looking for more evidence before launching a full scale alien eradication program.

Come up with your supporting arguments and let me know. But hurry - their army get stronger by the day.

Easter Funnies

2009-04-12T14:56:00.000-07:00

Saturday Morning Movie Review with Al Borlan

2009-04-11T10:26:00.000-07:00

Friday night is movie night in our household. So every Saturday morning Al Borlan and I will let you know what we watched and whether or not it's worth your time. Ok, so it's not the real Al Borlan, but close enough, right?

1st Up - "Special"

I thought this was going to be a dark, dry comedy and while it started out that way, it moved very slowly and switched quickly to a cringe-filled train wreck. Micheal Rappaport stars in this grainy tale of a man who participates in a drug trial who's side effects leave him believing he has super powers. Maybe I went into this one with the wrong mindset but I was ready for an intelligent comedy and I got one man's downward spiral into madness. I love downward spirals and I love madness (Aronofsky is my favorite director) but something about this didn't taste right. Special's identity crisis made the film confusing and feel too long at a mere 75 minutes. IMDB voters give it a 7/10, for whatever that's worth. Al Borlan slept through this one - he has no opinion.

2nd Flick - "Shuttle"

I can' t give this a full review. I fell asleep halfway through. I'm not going to watch the second half, so that should tell you something. Two girls get on a late night airport shuttle only to realize the driver is a madman. I love horror movies so I always give the new ones a shot, but the first half of the movie was filled with ridiculous scenarios and illogical situations. Many times I turned to Al to say, "Why wouldn't she just....?" His response - "Because this movie is bullshit." He did watch the entire thing, but I think that is because of his power nap during "Special."

Sorry-no good films to report this week, try back next week. I did, however, get free Cinna Stix from Dominos by using the online coupon code "online". So, I've got that going for me.

Sometimes I Like You

2009-04-10T11:54:00.000-07:00

These e-cards are perfect when you don't care if you're being offensive. Either that or for comic relief with someone who knows you well enough to know that you don't really mean it. I once sent one to my father that read "Congratulations on not getting paid enough to get laid off." In that instance I was the only one enjoying the humor, but mostly they rock my face off.

Visit someecards.com to show your love.

Namaste and ... oh! she's down.

2009-04-09T17:47:00.000-07:00

I love yoga. Love it, love it, love it. I love the movement, the funny words, the way it makes me feel. But - I'm really bad at it. Terrible, actually. I am constantly knocking my head into living room furniture, cursing, falling over and making ungodly noises.

Well, that's why it's called "practicing" yoga.
Lesson: Do what you love, who cares if you suck. Sing, dance, whatever. Get over it and have a good time.

Here's how you can fall over in your living room: www.yogatoday.com is free yoga delivered daily. New, streaming classes every day and most of the instructors aren't annoying.

The Intent

2009-04-08T18:27:00.000-07:00

I am not new to blogging, I do it for work all the time. I have Facebook, Twitter, MySpace, LinkedIn - but I've never written a personal blog. I thought I might as well start tonight. There's nothing on T.V. and I'm not working from home.

I just want to share the things that make me smile in hopes that you smile too. Tips, tricks, links, funny, sad, informative- you get it, right?

To start this thing off right I'm going to give you one of my favorite links. I love kid's strategy games. You know, the ones where you prentend you run a diner, a kitchen, a hotel. I tell myself that it's because they help with brain strength. Regardless, this site gives a free, full length game giveaway every weekend. www.game.giveawayoftheday.com

Your Welcome